Today we’re going to be talking about Thanksgiving, how to plan simply, Plus, I’ll be telling you how to avoid the post event  exhaustion. Dun dun dun. The post event letdown. The blues. The depletion.  You’ve all experienced it. So we’re going to talk about ways that you can support yourself in planning the event, enjoying the event, and preventing depletion. And one of the reasons why we’re really talking about this  It’s because what happens if you’re a stress eater and I assume that the majority of the women listening to this are stress eaters is that you have your normal ups and downs in life and when you have the downs we usually cope with food  and so if we can make life lighter and these events not get you so down  the likelihood of you needing food to get through them is lessened.

Now, even if you are someone who’s been in the Weight Loss with the Holy Spirit program for a super long time  and  you’ve developed these habits and skills so that  you know how to get through the ups and downs of life without emotional eating, stress eating,  these events can sometimes dip you down to where you get into that zone where you do start comforting yourself with food. It’s just one of those things that are called human, and that’s what humans do. We get depleted and we look for coping mechanisms.  But what we’re trying to do here is to prevent that,   we know we’re heading into a vulnerable situation, what we can do as the woman who has been entrusted to take care of ourselves. 

Because you see, making plans like this is actually a way to worship. This is what the Lord has entrusted us to do.  I believe that second to loving the Lord, our number one job as a human being on this earth, as His chosen daughter,  our number one job, second to loving Him,  is to take care of ourselves. 

You guys, who has he entrusted the care of you to?  It’s not your husband.  It’s not your kids.  He’s entrusted the care of  you to  you. You’re the only person  that can make sure that you don’t overextend yourself. You’re the only person who’s going to fill up your water bottle. You’re the only person that’s going to make sure your favorite blanket’s on your bed.

You’re the only person that’s going to get you some more fluffy socks, because all of the socks from last winter got holes in them because you wore them too much.  And so I just want you to look at this podcast episode as a way to not complicate your life,  but as a way  to turn your face to you. To say, hey girl, this is going to be  out of the ordinary.

You don’t have to say it’s going to be a stressful or vulnerable time, and so I want to tell you a very simple way that you can simplify this. We just don’t want to overstress you, overextend you because we don’t want to stress eat. Nobody wants to stress eat.  So let’s all as a community decide  that we’re not going to have superhuman expectations of ourselves. We’re not going to intentionally sabotage ourselves by expecting too much of ourselves number one and number two, neglecting ourselves.

And one of the ways that we can neglect ourselves is by not making some simple plans. You guys, what I’m going to tell you today will probably take you about 10 minutes with yourself. A piece of your kid’s loose leaf paper if you’ve got kids,  and your favorite pen. I like to trick my brain by using a pencil because then it doesn’t feel like I could do it wrong. Also get a couple of pieces of paper because then you can throw them away. I really suggest that when you plan for Thanksgiving or any. Any event like this you plan before and after. So. I’m going to assume that you’re going to be planning the Friday before. Thanksgiving. Till the Tuesday after. So you’re planning for. 10 or 11 days. 

And so you’ll just get out. A piece of paper and you’ll write down Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. Wednesday Thursday is Thanksgiving. Friday Saturday, Sunday. Put some Protection for yourself, against the post event exhaustion and collapse. Your brain doesn’t want to do it. Your brain thinks you’re going to be fine, but just go with me. Just try this.  Now on that piece of paper then, write down any of the events that you know are already scheduled. 

Put mass in there, put where you’re going for Thanksgiving,  whatever you know, just go ahead and put it there. This is just sort of a loose plan. And one of the reasons that I love doing this is it just creates so much space in your brain. You don’t have to remember anything. Our brains superpower is really in what we’re doing right now, which is planning and strategizing and deep thinking.

It doesn’t need to store information like schedules. So if you can just get it out on a piece of paper, even this simple act  and this, say this is all you do, you will feel so much more peace.  Now the second thing I want you to do is to see what decisions you can make ahead of time.

Where do you anticipate decision fatigue or what things tend to be  Mmm, stressful for you in the moment decisions. And I want to tell you the two things for me are, what am I going to wear? I don’t know why, but clothes seem to be a pain in the neck. Even how I’m going to do my hair. Can you decide some of that stuff ahead of time? 

Can you just make sure that your pants are ironed or that, you know, one or two outfits that you feel really good in?  I have one of the women in our community who found that every time she would go out, whether it was to mass or out with her husband, she’s had so much mind drama about clothing. 

So on a day where she was having no mind drama, she just created three to four different outfits that she feels really good and they’re her go to outfits. We create go to meals in our communities, she just had go to outfits. I was like, that is so brilliant.  I’ve never formally done that. I’m so proud of her. 

So what can you decide ahead of time? The other thing that tends to cause me mind drama  is food. , making sure that I have the food that I like to have in the house.   And then I also like to just lose sketch  for Thanksgiving.

And then the days after, because I don’t know if your family is like mine,  but there’s this belief that, Hey, we’re having one meal on Thanksgiving and then we’re just going to have leftovers Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Like,  really? You know your family doesn’t like to do that. 

That doesn’t mean you have to cook Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.  You could  pick up  food on Friday.  Or, maybe you know you’re going to repurpose the turkey and do like a turkey turkey.  Soup. 

Turkey wraps.  Maybe you want to repurpose the mashed potatoes. Oh my gosh, my mom used to do this. And make potato pancakes. How fun is that? Yeah, we used to do that. That was super cool.  Just decide ahead of time. , how can you make this easier? . Is there anything that you can do to prepare? 

Ahead of time, like can you cut the potatoes Now? I don’t even know if you can do stuff like that. I’m not like a really great cooker.  What can you do ahead of time, like a day or two ahead of time so it doesn’t feel like a whole bunch in one day? Sometimes people like doing a whole bunch in one day. I don’t.

I’d rather do a little bit every day. Can you dust. Today, or maybe you can  do extra laundry today, so you don’t have to do it. Just what can you do ahead of time, so it doesn’t feel overwhelming.

Two more things.  What can you do that would make the day of easier? What shortcuts can you take? Can you use 10 pans? So you can just throw away dishes.    If you’re taking a dish somewhere, can you just buy a dollar store bin? So you don’t have to worry about bringing it home.

You just leave it there. Even a spoon. You just leave it there.  Can you buy already cut up vegetables for things?  Are there shortcuts that you can take?  , if you love cooking, cook.  If you don’t, and that stresses you out, let’s just make it easier. Do you really have to make the dessert?

Can’t you just go to Costco and buy the pie? One of the other things is I want you to look at your schedule and see where’s you time. One of the things that you’re trying to do during this time is to not only enjoy the holiday so that the focus isn’t on everyone else enjoying the holiday, but also to prevent that post event exhaustion. And part of doing that is  having less than superhuman expectations of yourself, but also as we go through the next couple days leading up to Thanksgiving,  where’s your time? 

Where are you putting restorative time?  Maybe you know that there’s going to be a lot of people in your house come Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.  Can you take some time on Tuesday?  Maybe that means just an hour of sitting in your room, quiet.  Where can you put, even when people are around, mini M I N I restorative times? 

I like to have what I call mini retreats with the Lord. So even when people are around,   just have a little chat with him. Unloading the dishwasher. While I’m cooking,  some people like music, I don’t. Cooking is, requires a lot of brain power for me.

And one of the things I do to make cooking easier for me, even when on a day to day basis, is  I’ll make a list of what I’m doing during that time in the kitchen. When my kids come home from school,  Right now they don’t seem to need a lot of help with their homework, that’s  my time in the kitchen. 

Before I even start in the kitchen, I write a list of what I need to do. Warm up the soup, make the salad, the garlic bread so that I can just easily mark off the list. And that just allows me to just not have so much swimming through my brain.   I found I was grumpy mom in the kitchen. It’s just a lot of work for me.  That’s just me, and that’s just my brain, so I’m just trying to like,  make it easier for me. You just keep asking yourself, where can I put mini restorative time?

For example, Friday morning. If you know Thanksgiving  is the big day. Can you ask your husband to put the kids to bed at night?  Or maybe you are, but you ask him to take care of the kids Friday morning until like  10,  11,  9, decided that you are going to give yourself some time.  Go for a walk,  , go to adoration, whatever you like to do.  Go out with a friend. Whatever fills you up.

Whatever it is just find some time in there.  And if you have people coming  Maybe that time is Monday. Maybe that’s when they leave. But you’re definitely not going to jump back into Monday morning  into normal life. Just recognize you are going to need that refill time. Let’s talk about post event exhaustion before we talk about how you’re going to eat on Thanksgiving.

So Post event exhaustion. . around Thanksgiving. You have been running on high,  a higher level, let’s say more, more balls to juggle. Let’s just say that around Thanksgiving. And what goes up must come down. So if you’re expending more energy during this time, even more energy in self care, which is a great use of your energy,  it just means that there’s been more balls to juggle.  And sometimes, juggling those balls  means  keeping your expectations low in that self talk during this whole time, like, hey, no, this is fine.

This is fine. We’re doing 10 pans this time.  We’re going to serve on dollar store platters so I can just throw them away. Just know that there’s been more balls to juggle. You’ve been expending more energy. So what goes up must come down.  And so afterwards,  you will find that your energy is lower, and you might even have some blues.

You might even find that you’re a little depressed.  I’m telling you this because it’s totally normal. This recently happened to me, and that’s where I got the idea for this podcast. I did a workshop that was so amazing,  it was awesome, I felt so great, and the next morning I woke up and I just felt blue, I just felt down.

And , I didn’t have a thought like,  my workshop didn’t go well. I just felt like I had less energy and I don’t know about you guys, but when I have less energy or I feel a little blue, a little down, a little low,  I want to be like, what’s wrong with me? I must’ve done something wrong.

Or I try to figure it out.  You guys know what figuring it out does. It expends more energy.  What I want to encourage all of you, especially if you’re a stress eater, especially if you’re in the Weight Loss with the Holy Spirit program, is that when you have these feelings,  you don’t try to figure it out.

You just say, wow, I’m feeling kind of low today. I’m having a low energy day.  How can I take care of myself here? How can I be more kind and loving to me? I didn’t do anything wrong.  This isn’t not what it should be because we keep telling ourselves it shouldn’t be this way. And that’s where we resist reality. 

Again, resisting reality, trying to figure it out only depletes us even more.  And so part of supporting ourselves through this post event exhaustion is our mindset of saying, Oh, this is exactly what’s supposed to happen. Do you see  I’m feeling a little low.  I don’t like it. I love saying that to the Lord.

I don’t like feeling this way because what Denise Jelinek really likes is I like a lot of energy. I like feeling up. I like feeling upbeat. I love feeling productive. I love getting off, checking things off my list.  That’s what I like. So when I feel low, I feel really uncomfortable. It feels a little unsettling because I think I should be different  and I’m just telling you this now because it’s going to happen and when it does,  I want you to be prepared. 

Number one. Be prepared by thinking, Oh, there it is. Okay, this is normal. This is totally normal.   Number two, to recognize that it’s so normal because you did such an amazing job over the weekend. You took care of so many people. You took care of yourself.  You had Thanksgiving.  You took care of yourself by eating moderately. 

And even if you found you overate, you took care of your feelings, you didn’t make it mean anything,  you scheduled time for yourself. I want you to just see all the wins.  And then finally,  how can you soothe yourself? How can you make that day  easier? I’m going to suggest that you schedule 48 hours, 48 hours. 

Just write down a few things. What are you going to do during those 48 hours? What are you not going to do?  How can you make it easier?  This is your post event collapse protocol.  Post event exhaustion. Post event depletion. What are you going to do? What are you not going to do?  How are you going to talk to yourself during this time?

You see, because after an event… Like this.  On one hand, normal life returning feels very soothing and comfortable. But what happens is that normal life returning usually means that the pile up of normal life Exists, which means that there’s more laundry. You haven’t been tending to your email.

You’ll feel like you pushed off things that you said, I’ll start that after Thanksgiving. And so come Monday, it almost feels like that comfort of familiarity of a normal routine is then squashed.  By a massive,  double to do list. 

Can you see  how post event exhaustion  will be present and then is only magnified and made worse by not planning for it and having superhuman expectations and thinking that you’re going to tackle that 48  hours.  48 hours to have this plan. That doesn’t mean 48 hours sitting on a couch,  but it means 48 hours of the pace that you’ll set. 

Will you expect yourself to get all the laundry done in one day?  What if it took 48 hours? What if it took 72 hours? What if you didn’t do laundry until Wednesday?  What if you were able  check emails with some tea or coffee? And  If it required an action beyond a simple answer, you just put that on a to do list  that you’ll schedule later.  You just allowed yourself to just find out what work needs to be done. 

You see,  the world isn’t on fire. We’re not that important  to everybody else, but guess who we are that important to?  We’re that important to us.  And if we keep putting superhuman expectations on ourselves, and keep this pace of life that’s so stinkin stressful, that plummets us down into a place that’s only possible  to cope with by stress eating,  we’ll never find a way out. And part of being… A woman who doesn’t stress eat  is learning how to create a life that doesn’t need stress eating to get through it.

So I think I made a pretty good case for how to prevent the post  Thanksgiving exhaustion,  and what you can do  during. How to support yourself, and how to prevent that.  and what expectations to have on yourself.  All right, so the final piece is Thanksgiving. And I want to tell you what Thanksgiving is known as  in women who don’t stress eat. 

Thanksgiving is also known  as Thursday.  Thursday.  So, in the Weight Loss with the Holy Spirit program, the way that I encourage women to address Thanksgiving is to make a plan.  We have two food rules in our community, and they are that you love the food that you eat and you feel good about it, so just make a plan on what you’re going to eat.

You’re like, Denise, that makes no sense. How can I make a plan? Well, you can make a loose plan. You can make a loose plan that you’re going to make sure that you eat breakfast.    A couple ways that people make plans are things like this.

I’m going to have one plate of appetizers and one moderate and honest plate  at the main meal.  And let’s say your main meal is at three o’clock. Well, if your main meal is at three o’clock, you’ll probably be hungry at like noon. So maybe you could have breakfast, like a snack at noon,  a main meal at three, and then some sort of  smaller meal  in the evening, maybe combined with your evening snack.

And I say that because I have an evening snack  , most, most nights. And so I really like it. So if I had like a smaller meal in the evening, I would definitely want to make sure that I have my little evening snack. So it’d probably go together.  Just think about it 

how’s this going to play out?  You can make changes. It’s not a big deal, but at least you’ve thought of it ahead of time. So you’re not freaking out that day. Another way that you can make a plan is like on your plate you can say, I’m going to have, two servings of starch. So I’m going to have a moderate amount of mashed potatoes, a moderate amount of, stuffing, whatever your favorites are.

And then another cup worth of two sides. And then I’m going to have.  Some turkey, but I’m probably not going to have the turkey breast because I think it’s always so dry. So I’m going to have some dark meat and if you’re like that person who likes to eat skin, just put down that you’re going to have skin because what I find is that people pick at food that they think they shouldn’t have  and then it just becomes this mind drama.

Like you feel like you’re hiding that you’re picking at food. Some other food rules that keep me safe are things like, I don’t stand and eat and I used to stand and eat while I would help clean up the kitchen. You can just decide how much pie you’re going to have, how many pieces. 

I had this one client who would schedule to eat pie the next day for breakfast.  That sounds weird, doesn’t it? Like, cause we’re talking about weight loss.  But she liked it.  It worked for her.  I think she eventually decided that she wouldn’t do that. But she felt okay planning it. And here’s what’s so cool, you guys, is that you can just try it  and then just tweak it.

If you’re like, ooh, that didn’t feel really good. Having pie for breakfast was not a good idea. That didn’t feel great. Didn’t work for me. You just tweak it. It’s not shameful. You didn’t do anything wrong. You’re just trying it. You’re just experimenting now the final thing that usually comes with Thanksgiving or any holidays are  People asking you  Questions about food and they might ask you a question like would you like  Fill in the blank.

So they’re going to ask you a question. Would you like that? Or have you had blah, blah, blah, or I made this for you. All right. So just realize that people are going to ask you questions. You can say no, thank you.  If someone says, would you like to have da, da, da, da, da. No thank you is a complete sentence. You might have to say no, thank you a couple of times.  If someone says, Oh my gosh, I made those brownies. Have you had them?  Oh, I haven’t yet. That’s how I say it. Oh no, I haven’t yet.  And unless I plan to have a brownie, I’m not going to have it. Now I could have a brownie, but I’m going to tell you I want to love my reasons.

So if you change your plan,  I suggest it’s not impulsive. I never feel good about impulsive food decisions. I usually don’t feel good if it feels impulsive. It does not feel good either if I feel pressure to eat something. So if it feels impulsive or pressure, those are my two indications that I’ll probably regret this later. 

So let’s say my aunt says, Hey, have you tried those brownies? It’s this new recipe. I know you like brownies. I made them for you. Have you tried them? And I could say, No, I haven’t yet. And so in my brain I might be thinking, Oh, I kind of want those brownies. I can go to the bathroom. I can check in with myself. 

I’m really just trying to not feel impulsive. So I want to love my reasons that I’m choosing to eat the brownie and I don’t want to feel pressure.   I don’t want to feel  obligated  because you guys, one of my favorite  things that helps me at holidays is this thought. I’m the one that has to put my head on my pillow at night. 

So my aunt, although she loves me, she’s not the one that has to deal with the feelings of me.  Eating something that I didn’t really want to eat. And I was just people pleasing to eat it.  I just really try not to make food or self care decisions based on other people, based on what I think they want.

That’s so silly. I just don’t have to do that anymore. And I don’t want that for you either. So you might just decide  to feel that freedom and confidence and in control to make a plan ahead of time.  And as you go for through the day to just realize that you’re the one that’s in control.  If you need to go take a break, go take a break.

Find that mini restorative time.  You know, it’s kind of fun. if you need a break from your family or you need a break,  find a comedian on YouTube that you can watch. The names are escaping me of the funny ones that are really clean.  So I hope you feel empowered. I hope you see how you can take care of you and have such a much more enjoyable  Thanksgiving, I’m not saying that you’re going to want to redo the day, but I’m definitely saying that you’re going to end that day feeling good about yourself. 

You’re going to end that weekend, looking back and saying, dang, How’d you get so good at taking care of you? Your future self is just going to thank you so much. I know this podcast was longer, but the work that I explain here really won’t take you that long to do.

So I hope this has been helpful. And if you want someone to walk side by side with you, this holiday. Holiday season. So that you celebrate without the sabotage. Come on. On over to weight loss with the holy spirit.com. And get started today. This. This week, we begin our eight week celebrate, not sabotage challenge. 

All right, everybody have a very blessed day.