And then I also want to teach you a skill that you can start honing and learning on how to be your own Catholic weight loss coach.  It’s a skill that it is worth learning because you’ll be able to use it for the rest of your life.

 Let me begin with, a little bit about goal setting.  Now the way I used to set goals is,  I would look at every single area of my life, see where I wanted it to improve, and I would make all these goals for each area of my life. It would be my prayer, my personal, exercise, food, my parenting, my marriage,  work, business.

So there would be all these goals.  And I’m going to tell you that I could look at those goals a month later and they would still be all the same and I wouldn’t have  taken steps forward. So I want to encourage you to take this year to pick one thing,  one area of your life,  and it will be the year of  fill in the blank. 

I’m going to assume it’s the year of getting to your healthy weight because you’re listening to this.  What if this is the year? That’s dedicated to getting to your healthy weight, improving your relationship with yourself, improving the self care, loving the way that you eat your food, just finding simplicity and peace in the way that you care for yourself and manage your weight. 

What if that was what this year was about? Now you’ll know what to pick as your goal for the year because you know it’s the area of your life that will affect everything else. Everything else will get better if you focus on  getting to a healthy weight,  you know that you’ll feel more confident, you know that you’ll have a better relationship with your husband.

You may find that you won’t be as grumpy with your kids and you guys, it is not your food and your weight, but what happens is I’ll tell you about how when we live in tornado thinking our minds.  Can just be so consumed that we really can’t live closely to the Lord. So if you see yourself acting in a way that doesn’t feel aligned with the Lord in other areas of your life, not just in your food and weight,  it can be because you haven’t learned what I’m going to be teaching you today.

And so when we feel unbalanced and in tornado thinking and spinning out in all of the problems, we tend to be a little grumpy around people.  So today I’m going to teach you how to be your own coach, how to be your own Catholic coach, how to be your only Catholic weight loss coach,  so that this entire yearyou can live closer to the Lord  and making  progress towards your healthy weight. Now I’m not saying learning this skill takes a year,  but it is worth taking the year to continue to practice it. You’ll be able to apply this to anything in your life. 

Okay. So that’s my number one tip. My number one tip is find one area of your life that you say, Hey, listen, I’m going to dedicate this year to that because I know it will improve all the areas of my life. It will improve my faith. It will improve my marriage, my parenting, the work I do professionally, whether in or outside of the home.

Like I said, so today I’ll be teaching you how to be your own weight loss coach in 2024. This will not take a year to hone this skill,  but it is worth taking the year to continue to practice it.  And you may be even thinking to yourself, what in the world does that even mean? What is a weight loss coach?

Is that even a thing? And honestly, before I came into becoming a coach. I thought it was like, woo. I kind of thought it was something that was made up, that wasn’t true.  But once I started becoming a coach and I started coaching myself, my life became a lot different. Yes, it is a thing. 

 And you can start doing that for yourself. And this is the skill. And so I want you to know it’s a skill, which means it can be practiced. It feels a little odd at first, anything you’ve ever done, you’ve never done it before. So it does feel odd.

So I want you to know it’s a skill that you can practice. this. This is something that I teach to all of my clients. Did you hear me? I teach this to all of my clients because my job is not to not make my clients dependent on me. My job is to teach them everything that they need to know to get to and maintain their healthy weight for the rest of their life in every season of their life.

My job is to impart skills and teach them. My goal is never to make people dependent on me. So once you learn this, you will be able to have it for your entire life. Have I sold you pretty hard on this? Yes, you need to know how to do this. And the second thing that I want   to impart to you today is how imperative practicing this is to hearing the Lord’s voice.

When you hear the Lord’s voice, and we as Catholic women want to be obedient to the Lord and do what he says,  hear his voice, do what he says, do you know what we’re doing then?  We’re living in the Lord’s will. We’re taking our human will and aligning it with his, which means we live in his divine will. So what I’m going to teach you can have, in my opinion, eternal benefits. 

So stick with me on this friends. So what does a coach do? So there are three basic roles to a coach. 

But for our discussion, there are three basic roles. Number one, a coach shows you what your thoughts are.  A coach reflects back to you what your behaviors are. They say, Hey, listen, when you do A plus B, you get C.  Then a coach steps back and gives you some space, some space to evaluate, oh, is that what I want?

Do I wanna keep that?  Do I want to change that? And then, if you do want to change it, they’ll guide you into how that’s even possible. And I’m going to give you a simple framework that you can use later because chances are, if you’re looking at getting to a healthy weight, right now you’re saying, what I’m doing A plus B does not equal the C that I want. 

I want a different result. So I’m going to teach you how you can use a simple framework to get different results. So here’s an example. I eat three cookies plus the thought, Oh, I blown it for the day. What does the C get you? The C is that eat all the things.   And you don’t have to do that. I’m going to show you  that. You don’t have to do that.

The second thing that a coach does is they are your cheerleader.  They’re reminding you of how much progress you’ve made. They’re seeing all the good things that you’re doing.  They’re uplifting you. They’re encouraging you. They’re supporting you. They’re being the Lord’s voice to you. They’re saying to you what what the Lord would say to you if you were on this earth.

And you can start doing that for yourself. Start seeing all the good things that you’re doing, all the progress you’re making. And seriously, if you think about five years ago, you know so much more. You’ve grown so much. And now your brain’s going  to say, yeah, but look at the scale. Really?  I’m not going to use this scale to determine our only measure of growth.

No. And a coach wouldn’t do that either.

 And the third thing that a coach does is they help you problem solve. They help you get some distance to look at, hey, what’s the actual situation? What are the problems here? What are the issues that keep tripping me up? And they brainstorm with you and they help you calm down to logically think of solutions. 

Did you guys know that one of your superpowers is problem solving?  Yeah.  You do it all day long. And you do it for other people. You see your kids are going through a problem. You see somebody at work has a problem. And you can think logically about different options. The thing is, is that you just haven’t applied it to your weight loss efforts yet. 

And you can.  And so that’s the third thing a coach does is they start to say, Hey, how can we make this easier for you?  How can we solve for whatever seems to be tripping you up? 

Don’t you think those three things would be like amazing skills to hone for yourself? Number one, being able to see if you’re getting the results you want and know what you have to do to change them to get the results that you want. Number two, being an awesome cheerleader and talking to yourself the way the Lord would.

Not that mean girl that’s inside your head right now. And the third thing is starting to look at options in problem solving.  Yes, that is, those are three amazing skills that every human should learn  on this earth, especially women who are trying to get to a healthy weight 

So now what does this have to do with your relationship with the Lord? So here’s how this goes. 

The Lord is always speaking to us, but our thoughts are so noisy.  

Like a tornado. They feel unsettled.

They feel unclear. They feel cloudy. 

It’s like you’re watching The Wizard of Oz, and you have this tornado, and then you see a rocking chair, and then you see a dog, and then you see a newspaper, right? So there’s just all these thoughts that are going through our head. And I like to call them noisy, even though they’re not audibly noisy.

And that noise is things like diets. Oh my gosh. Thoughts about my weight. Thoughts about the way my body looks. Oh, I shouldn’t eat that. I should eat that low carb keto. Oh, well, what about for exercise? Should I do low, slow cardio or should I do high intensity interval training, hit training?

I look fat. So there’s like 60, 000 thoughts.  Which are the sentences that are going through your brain a day.  not all of them are tornado thoughts. The thoughts that go through our head, I like to put into two buckets.  And in one bucket, we have thoughts that are distracting us, that we are obsessing about, and distracting us from what the Lord has in store for us.

A lot of the women that I work with are very much distracted by thoughts and worries about other human beings.  It’s distracting us. It’s something that we’re worrying about. It’s agitating us. It’s unsettling us. It’s leading us away from the Lord. It’s not the thoughts that are aligned with the Lord. And you guys have heard from 2 Corinthians 10 5, take captive your thoughts  and align them with the Lord,  which doesn’t assume that all the thoughts in your head.

Are already aligned with the Lord. No, he’s saying we got to do something about all those thoughts. We have to take them captive and then we can align with them with the Lord and that’s a skill which I’ll be teaching you in a second.  So there’s two buckets of thoughts that are going through your head.

They’re just sentences and  there’s the tornado thoughts that are leading us away from the Lord that feel agitation and the truth is is that these tornado thoughts the only reason we’re talking about them in terms of being your own weight loss coach  Well, number two reasons, because they lead you away from the Lord, but the second reason is they’re not getting you any closer to your healthy weight. 

They’re blocking you from getting to your healthy weight.  So, you have two buckets of thoughts. One doesn’t get what, get you what you want, takes you farther from the Lord, and now the other bucket of thoughts, though, are  The thoughts that are true. They’re of the Lord. They lead you closer to God.

And when I say lead you closer to God, , or of God, is because when you have a thought that’s aligned with Him, you will feel clarity. You will feel peace. It will feel encouraging. It will feel uplifting. It will feel gentle. It will feel tender.  A thought not of the Lord.  Feels chaotic and confusing.

We feel rushed and hurried and critical.

So it’s those two buckets.  That second bucket that leads us closer to the Lord,  closer to virtue,  actually also  gets us the results we want.  Gets you to that healthy weight.  So you’ve got two buckets. Two buckets of thoughts. Ones that get you what you want and closer to the Lord and ones that don’t get you what you want and farther from the Lord. 

In weight loss, life, wellness, health coaching,  it’s all about your thoughts, my friends. I believe our job as followers of the Lord  is to be able to observe our thoughts, 

And to filter out which ones are of him and which ones are not of him, which ones get us what we want and which ones don’t get us what we want, which ones are lies and which ones are true. And that sounds like a big job, but I’m going to tell you how to do that. And it’s a super easy way.  There’s a simple framework for this and I like to call it the Catholic weight loss coaching  framework.  What we do is we detect our thoughts. We calm ourselves down. We recollect.  And then I’m going to teach you a very simple framework that you can use to reflect.  And then our job is to protect. So first we detect when we’re in that tornado,  calm ourselves down, recollect, come back.

Ooh, there’s that tornado.  Then we reflect, which is a framework I’ll be teaching you.  tHen finally from reflecting, we protect.  What do we protect ourselves from? We protect our brains and our thoughts. by thinking and living on purpose. I will teach you how you can start to live on purpose, to live in alignment with A, the Lord, and B, what you want.

By thinking on purpose  and by being dedicated to this very simple  Four step process, which is detect, recollect, reflect, and protect. Even when we are living on purpose, we’re going to start to go back in tornado thinking.

We’re going to start to go back into those thoughts that aren’t true, that feel chaotic. Totally fine.  It doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. It means you’re, human. But our job is to just detect when that’s happening,  recollect, calm ourselves down,  and if we’re ready, we can go ahead and reflect on, oh, that’s what I was thinking.

That’s why I felt so out of sorts.

And I just want to say this is so important because when we are stuck in tornado thoughts,  did you hear what I said? We’re stuck in tornado thoughts. We’re stuck. We’re stuck. We’re not moving anywhere. 

And we keep thinking those thoughts over and over and over. And the more we give energy to thoughts that aren’t true or aren’t aligned with the Lord, the stronger those thoughts are.  And so the more that we can start to detect them and transform them into thoughts that are aligned with the Lord, and that’s in that protection stage, 

we can live in the Lord’s world.  We can actually problem solve.  And identify what needs to be done. No matter what area you’re using this framework in,  your whole life will start to feel balanced because you’ll detect when you’re off and you can get back into balance.

You will see that  everything will feel more balanced, more at peace, including your food and your weight.  Yeah, this is worth the work. So let’s dive in.   So let’s dive in. This simple framework was created. by Brooke Costile at the Life Coach School, but I learned it from Sterling Jaqueth at CatholicMomCalm.com, and then I’m also going to sprinkle in a little bit of the teachings from Dr. Carolyn Leaf, who’s a neuroscientist, and she does, like, amazing work and has done brain scans of the brain for decades and she knows exactly how our thoughts affect us physically, which I just eat up all that science.

I think that’s so fun.  In this simple framework, it will show you how what you’re thinking actually is responsible for everything that’s happening in your life. 

ALl right, so here’s what happens. This is the way that life goes. There are circumstances in your life that you cannot control. Circumstances are facts of life. They can be proven in a court of law.  Things happen. They’re neither bad nor good.

Now the only reason why you feel a positive or negative feeling about them is because then you have a thought. Now remember, I told you you’ve got two buckets of thoughts. You’ve got thoughts that lead you to what you want and are aligned with the Lord. And you have thoughts that lead you away from what you want and are not aligned with the Lord.

You have  60, 000 thoughts that are just running through your brain. These are just sentences.  They’re just like a ticker tape of news. Like I said, our job is to filter out the ones that lead us closer to the Lord and to ditch the ones that aren’t getting us what we want because our thoughts are so stinking powerful that when you have a thought, brain scans have been done that they send out neurotransmitters  into your body that you can experience and emotion inside your physical body.

So our thoughts, whatever your thought is,

and you have a feeling. An example, your husband walks in with a pizza  and you think, it would be so rude if I don’t eat that with the family.  And so you feel obligated, right? 

Totally fine.  Your husband can walk in with a pizza and you have the thought, what a jerk. I already told him I don’t want to eat junk food. Now we’re offended. Now we’re mad. Or husband walks in with a pizza  and you think, that’s so nice.

The kids will love that. Oh, what a special treat. And you feel appreciation.  Same circumstance., just three different thoughts. Three different feelings.  And so when we use this framework to coach yourself, you’re going to look at the circumstance.

Remember the circumstance, and I’m going to give you some examples, so don’t worry about this. The circumstance can be proven in a court of law.  Everyone can see husband walks in door with pizza.  The thought is the sentence that goes through your brain,  and that sentence  will create a feeling. A one word feeling.

Appreciation. Anger.  Obligation..  Now, why it’s so important is because we know that everything that you do and don’t do in this world is based on  your feelings. Your feelings drive your action.  Let me just give you the example.,  So the woman who says,  If I don’t eat it,  I won’t be fitting in with the family. 

She feels scared. She thinks a good mom needs to eat what her kids do.  And when you feel that feeling of scared, she will only feel safe. By eating the food. There’s things you’re doing and not doing. She’s eating the food. What is she not doing? She’s not  stepping back to check in.

Is that even true? She’s not even checking in with her thoughts. She just automatically  wants that unsafe feeling to go away. That scared feeling.   And the woman who thinks, Ah, I told him, I don’t want to have any junk food. What a jerk. She’s angry. So what is she going to do? She’s probably going to be short with her husband. 

She might eat it. Just because she’s so ticked off now.  She wants to feel better.  She’s grumpy. What she’s not doing is considering that  his real motives.  She’s not checking in with her feelings. She’s not recollecting. She’s not even detecting  that she doesn’t have to feel the way that she feels.

Isn’t that crazy, you guys?  You get to feel whatever you want based on your thoughts. How about the woman who says, Oh, that’s so nice. I don’t have to cook. That’s so nice for the kids. That’ll be such a nice treat. She has that feeling of appreciation. What’s she gonna do? She’ll probably hug her husband. 

Doesn’t mean she needs to eat the food. She might not eat it. She sees it’s for them.  She can if she wants. But it’ll come from a softer place.  It’ll be her decision.  Isn’t that crazy?  That is the power of being able to detect your tornado thinking.  Calming yourself down.  Recollecting. Reflecting, and this is the framework for reflecting.

It is literally this simple. 

Now from those feelings, you will have actions, things that you do and not do. And I want to remind you that if you’re listening to the podcast, I’m going to put a link in the  show notes so that you can see this video. I’ll also put a link so that you can see the graphics that I’m putting up.  SO depending on what you’re doing and not doing, you will get a certain result  and the result is whatever related to the thought. So it could be  what a jerk  the result is.  You’re the one that’s being unkind. You’re the one that’s being a jerk.  You might say,  that’s so nice that he brought that.

Oh, that’s so nice.  You show your appreciation. You are nice.  You are kind. 

And for the woman who says, Oh no, I  have to eat with my family. Otherwise, it’ll be odd and awkward. The result is you do eat with them.  And then you feel odd and awkward about your choice.  

So you get to use this to evaluate everything that’s happening in your life. to evaluate.  

Take out a piece of paper. And on the left-hand side, you’ll write a C T F a R C for circumstance T for thought, after feelings a for actions. And then I like to have two columns for the actions, what you’re doing and not doing, and then R for results. 

So this was adapted by Brooke Castillo at the life coach school. I did not make it up except I added the columns.  

If it’s a fact and it’s neutral, it goes in the circumstance line. If it’s a thought, a sentence in your brain that creates a feeling. 

Then that goes in the thought line. Maybe you’re having a feeling that goes in the feeling line. It’s just one feeling though and you can play it out to the actions. What are you doing and not doing? I love listing what I’m not doing as well as what I’m doing and then you can see your result. 

SO we like to say that there are things that are happening that are just happening to us. We didn’t give them permission. You have thoughts in your head that are driving your results  and getting you to what you have now, but it might not be what you want. And I like to call those unintentional models.

 And so by looking at our unintentional models, we can also.  Decide how we do want to continue. So let me give you one example.  I ate three cupcakes and you have this thought, Oh, I can’t believe I did that. And you feel shame.  And what you’re doing is you’re being harsh and critical on yourself. You just feel horrible and grumpy, like grumpy with other people and you feel so horrible. You probably eat more,  but you’re not doing from this place of shame  is being curious and saying, Oh,  that was hard.

I wonder why I did that.  Being curious and open.  You’re not looking for real solutions. Or how can you help yourself through this? You’re not being kind and gentle.  And so, if you had the thought, I can’t believe I did this. The result is, is that you still can’t believe that you did this and you don’t even understand why you did it.

Instead, what I want to teach you is how to think on purpose.  Now, when you think on purpose, you get to start creating this new model for yourself. You can change the thought line. How would I like to feel or how would I like to think about this?  You can change the feeling line. How would I like to feel?

You can change the action line, or you can change the result line, which is super fun. If you wanted to put on there,  I lose five pounds, all you do is work backwards. What would the actions be to get you to lose five pounds? What would  the feeling that would need to drive those actions?

And you might have several feelings that would lead to different actions. And what would the thought be that you would need to think on purpose to get that feeling?  So you can play around and coach yourself in a variety of ways. It’s so fun. I love this.  But for this example, I ate three cupcakes.

I wanted to come in on wanting to feel curious,  right?  I don’t know if anybody would say, I ate three cupcakes. You would be disappointed. You would have those feelings.  And you probably wouldn’t want to go to, Oh, it’s okay.  Sweep it under the rug. Pretend like it didn’t happen. You can, but that’s not coaching yourself. 

Instead, what if you could cultivate the feeling of being curious? Hmm.  Let’s see what you would do and not do it from a place of being curious. If you’re curious, you would Look at what happened. And in our Weight Loss with the Holy Spirit community, we invite women to just pause, step back, look at the scenario like you’re watching a movie. 

What do you notice?  How are you feeling?  And you’ve cut some distance between you and the situation.  So you’d probably look at what happened. You’d start to be that detective. Hmm. What can I learn from this?  You’d problem solve. You’d get some clarity and understanding.  What you wouldn’t do if you’re curious is sweep it under the rug. 

Oh, it’s not that big of a deal. Nevermind. I’m just going to like pretend it didn’t happen. You’re not going to criticize yourself and shame yourself.  Right? Doesn’t that sound more lovely? Just get curious.  So then the question is, what thought can you think on purpose to cultivate that feeling? of being curious.

And you can try on these thoughts like you would try on hats.  The thought that I kind of played around with that could work is,  I’m open to learning what God wants to reveal to me here.  I know there’s something I can learn here. Now if that doesn’t thought work, if that thought doesn’t work for you and doesn’t cultivate that feeling of curiosity, 

It’s not a big deal. You can just try on a different thought, like try on a different hat. 

But the woman who says, I’m open to learning what the Lord reveals to me,  the result is, you do learn what the Lord reveals to you. That’s aligning your thought to the Lord. Moving you towards a healthy weight. Do you see how one woman is open and curious  and the other woman is stuck and condemning herself and critical? 

No,  we want to cultivate thoughts that are aligned with the Lord and getting us closer to what we want,  not keeping us stuck and not of the Lord and keeping us in that tornado thinking. 

So you guys, that is how you can be your own weight loss coach. 

There’s more to this. I’m going to do a part two of some of the more nuanced pieces of this self coaching model, but I wanted to just give you an overview in this episode. 

 It is a hundred percent worth the effort. It is worth the effort because it’s going to get you to a healthy weight.

It’s going to restore balance and peace in your life. It’s going to get you closer to what the Lord wants for you. It’s going to help you live every moment of your life in His will, because you’ll be able to detect when you’re out of His will, and have a simple framework to get back into His will. Isn’t that amazing? 

Nobody teaches this to humans walking the earth, and I feel like it’s one of those things  that is  exactly how we can take our humanness and align it to the Lord’s will.  It is the thing. Because go with me on this. What is the one thing that leads you into temptation? The one thing that leads you into sin? 

Isn’t it just your thoughts?  Yeah.  The only thing that leads us into temptation  are our thoughts.  And if we can start to observe them  and start to manage them and take control over them, we can start to distance ourselves.  from the things that the Lord does not want for us.  Like I said, I really believe there are  eternal benefits to this work.  The other piece to this is that I talk to women a lot about self care  and I believe that taking the time  To know your thoughts is what is called authentic self care and authentic self care is caring for ourselves the way the Lord would if he were on this earth and I think the Lord would be  so happy and so excited every time we  take the time to look at our thoughts and say, whoa, that is not of God. 

How  can I let that go? How can I take that thought and transform it? And now you have a simple framework on how to do that.

This is how you’ll be able to detect. Why you’re not getting what you want, but how to realign your thoughts to get what you want. It’s a huge part of what I teach on how to learn to get to the ups and downs of life without eating. 

And this is how you can create a life where you  detect when you’re in that thought, recollect, calm yourselves down, use this framework to reflect on what’s cooking, and then decide how you want to protect your life by living on purpose. 

And then you’ll have to detect when you’re in tornado thinking again. But it is just a commitment to learning the skill. 

So a few reminders. What is a Catholic weight loss coach and how can you be your own?  You be your own by looking at your behaviors and your thoughts and saying A plus B is equal and C here. Is that what I want?  If not, this is how you change it  Number two seeing all the amazing things that  you’re doing well Talking to yourself the way the Lord would being encouraging and uplifting  Quieting that mean girl voice number three problem solving, this is necessary for every woman who will live at a healthy weight for the rest of her life to learn. In my opinion,  my goal is never to make people dependent on me. It’s to teach them everything that they need to get to and maintain a healthy weight for the rest of your life. And I believe that this is one of the most simple ways that you can get to a healthy weight. And 

Hear the Lord’s voice to be able to quiet our thoughts because the Lord is always talking to us. Just sometimes our thoughts are so darn noisy that we can’t hear the Lord’s voice. And when we hear the Lord’s voice  and we say yes,  A plus B equals C is living in His will.  And that has eternal benefits and that’s what I want for you.

This whole entire journey is how to live connected with the Lord. In every moment of your life, and I believe that’s 100 percent possible, but it takes living with attention and intention.  And being aware.  

And I know what I shared with you is very new and it’s really hard to be able to practice this over and over. If you’re not surrounded by other women who are doing the same darn thing. And so I want to invite you to try our community just for a week.  For $1. If you have a dollar, I want to invite you in. When I invite you in to try our community you have instant access to our entire weight loss with the holy spirit program. That teaches you how to get to and maintain a healthy weight for the rest of your life. While eating the foods that you love, you’ll get the entire workbook. 

You can download it and print it off. It’s yours forever.  You can come to our group coaching, you can get personally coached.  Come to us. It’s the first week of January.  It’s $1. Try us out. Because as much as you can out of this week.  

It’s time to have more truth, more Catholic truth in this very confusing weight loss journey. I want to bring you so much hope and healing. And that only comes from living in the Lord’s message. And how we care for ourselves and getting to a healthy weight.

Isn’t it time that you stepped out of that condemning and restrictive and critical. You should do this. You should eat that  diet world.  It’s just not the way to get to a healthy weight. It’s not the way the Lord wants us to treat ourselves. So go to weight loss with the holy spirit.com. Sign up for your one week membership for $1. 

I promise you. You will see the difference. From the minute that you joined. 

Welcome to 2024.  This can be the year that you get to a healthy weight and you maintain it for the rest of your life. Because when we do things  the Lord’s way

He gives us his strength. He gives us his peace.  

And we’re able to live that way for the rest of our lives. Isn’t that amazing.  Okay. Everybody have a blessed day and  go to weight loss with the holy spirit.com. Sign up for your one week membership for $1.